STEP AWAY FROM THE JUICER


So it was revealed today by Dentist Dr Uchenna Okoye that the latest craze, juice diets are causing a rise in dental problems. She says that the sugar and acid in fruit juice erodes away enamel leaving shortened teeth and suggests instead that we use vegetables for our juices and drink them through a straw.

Celebrities including Carol Vorderman, Ed Sheeran and Katie Price have publically told how they turned to juicing for up to two weeks at a time as part of a health craze.

TWO WEEKS? PEOPLE ARE HAVING NOTHING BUT LIQUID FRUIT AND VEGETABLES FOR TWO WEEKS AT A TIME? I’m sorry. Are they MAD?

The juice fast is marketed as being a quick fix weight loss and a method of flushing ‘toxins’ out of the body. Some people have nothing but liquids, some include little bits of food as snacks or as meals depending on the type of cleanses and they can last between three days and three weeks.

Now I know very little about food and don’t pretend to be an expert on what we put into our bodies or why but as far as I can work out the cons seem to be seriously outweighing the pros in this situation.

Apart from the obvious medical reasons: there is very little protein in juices, they’re low in calories and they clearly destroy your teeth, I don’t know who in their right mind would want to spend loads and loads of money on generally disgusting drinks, and then sit in the house all day in a foul mood, with weird smelling wee, having to turn down every dinner invitation because Pizza Express are yet to add Quattro Formaggi Juice to their menu.

Are we mad? We’ve made it pretty clear here at Pretty Normal Me that we absolutely don’t support the fad-diet and of all of them I think this has to be my least favorite. I don’t know if there are any Modern Family fans out there, but there is a great episode Phil On A Wire (Season 3, Episode 3) in which Cam & Mitch embark on a juice diet. They’re horrible to each other, can’t go out and when they do, literally explode into this hangry mess.

Dieting in general absolutely sucks. However, what I have come to realize is that you should never embark on a ‘diet’, if you want to lose weight you need to change your lifestyle. And before you do that you need to establish what kind of life you want to live.

Do you want to have more energy? Sleep better? Have clearer skin? Better hair? Lose weight? Tone up? Yes, you probably do because every woman and their dog wants that. But then ask yourself; do you want to be hungry all the time? Do you want to be the ‘I don’t eat carbs’ girl? The calorie counter? The bore who misses pizza night? Who won’t drink wine because of the sugar content? The starving, angry, animal that you turn into when you miss a meal? No, probably not.

So, my very basic solution: You work out what kind of life you want, and go backwards from there. If you want to eat a chocolate brownie, fair play to ya, who wouldn’t? But if you’re watching what you eat, perhaps only have the one brownie and no more sweet in the day. If you want to sleep better, maybe stop eating carbs after six. UNLESS you’re out for dinner, or you just really really really want a jacket potato.

Because I’ve said before and I’ll say it again, you don’t want to live in fear of your scales, of your conscience, of your stomach and your guilt. You’ve still got to live a normal and happy life and try every day to be the best version of you, which is a tough enough feat before you turn down every morsel of food related joy in the day and then ridicule yourself senseless if you were to break one teensy tiny rule.

Generally I like to watch what I eat, but if I’ve exercised, I’ll chill on the worry, on Friday, I buy myself some popcorn and fruit-pastels to treat myself for a great effort… even if I’ve eaten a pizza the night before.

Yes, say no to an entire bar of Toblarone, but for heaven sake, don’t always leave the potatoes behind. You’ve got to remember to cram your body full of all the nutrients that it needs, and never forget that people are not living happy, fulfilled, 80 year long lives eating juiced spinach. Not least of all because it is disgusting.

You have to remember to reward yourself and be kind to yourself and before anything, look after yourself. I have a friend who lives by the motto “Take Care Of Your Body, It’s The Only Place You Have To Live” and whether that’s treating your feet to a bar of chocolate, or your right shoulder to a portion of chips, or even giving your finger nails the kale that it’s craving you’ve got to do the right thing by every little bit of you. And I don’t think part-time mushy vegetable obsessions are the answer.